it's ramadhan.

every morning i woke up with the feeling of nauseous.
and each time, i feel like i need to buka.
but with every each feeling of that, i mengucap.
it's to test our patience.

and it's not helpful either that i gets too sleepy and the needs to sleep.
i would bathe my son, feed him, play with him a while and pop.
i'm in matrix already.

he would wake me up by slapping me, smack my tummy or anything else he could.
and i would be telling him that, i'm so sorry. i need the rest dan.
and kissed him. he would run off to play.

when he did something wrong i couldn't scold him.
it's my fault for not watching him.

and when i'm in matrix.
i dreamt that i ate candy and drank a bottle of water.
all this kebesaran ALLAH.
for hubby gave me the permission to buka but i still refused.

thank you ALLAH.
for giving me the strength to hold on.